


now it's time for butt flashes. i must have subconsciously made it my mission to show the city of lynchburg my cheeks because i've been flashing all over town. EXHIBIT A: last week chris dropped me off at the office, and as i was jumping out of the vehicle my dress got caught under my hand which was placed firmly on the seat, causing my dress to come up to my waist, giving everyone a free show. who surrounds our office? an office full of state troopers and an office full of land surveyors - all male. embarrassing? you bet. EXHIBIT B: the day after that i was walking out of the post office (at lunch time when it's the busiest, obviously) when my foot slid on the wet sidewalk and i did a split...in a dress. my first thought was, "crap, how am i gonna play this off?" then i realized that gymnastics in a dress on the post office sidewalk can't be played off. luckily the only thing hurt was my pride (and i'm pretty sure it's still bruised). last, EXHIBIT C: the case of the flowy skirt and the windy day. i don't talk much about what i do for my part-time job, but technically i'm a field representative, and i go to meet clients (mostly car dealerships) to do their advertising. today while i was at a client's business, i was outside just starting to take pictures for his ad when a gust of wind came and blew my skirt up to my chin. first, this place is located on a very busy highway, so people saw; second, i was wearing a slip (luckily), but seeing as how it was white and semi-sheer, and it was a sunny day, nothing was left to the imagination; third, there were two guys sitting in their car which had broken down, and damn if my skirt didn't decide to fly up right in front of them! embarrASSing? YES!
now that i'm tucked safely away in my quiet house wearing FLANNEL PAJAMA PANTS i'm finally calming down. but honestly, i may never be able to show my face in lynchburg, va again!
not to self: stop reading dinosaur toes at work! it causes me to spontaneously laugh out loud, which in turn causes my co-workers to laugh and point at the strange girl laughing.
ReplyDeleteoops...i meant "note" to self
ReplyDeleteHAHAHAHAH. dude i couldn't stop laughing..this stuff happens to me too! i wore a dress the other day with no tights and was walking holding it down the whole time so i wouldn't show the world my cookah...and get chris to make those shelves they are awesome!
ReplyDeleteDude...all the time. I'm a constant skirt/dress holder cause it's SO windy here. We have what they call the Santa Ana's & guess what...I live less than half a mile to the Santa Ana River...so yeah, I'm a flasher! ;) You need book shelves! Ever since my dad build the ones in our den I've been dying for a ROOM...not just one wall...of my very own built ins! & I've been reading Divine Misfortune. It's a funny, fantasy-like world where getting a personal god calls for nothing more than a dating website. It's a very easy read but super entertaining. =)
ReplyDeleteThose book shelves are the things of dreams!!
ReplyDeleteFlowy skirts and windy weather are a no no! I've flashed my pants far too many times though but I think hey, I'd wear a bikini on a beach! It makes me feel less embarrassed! Haha.
Lady, I'm a huge fan of your blog - I'd like to put a button on mine to link back to you. Would you be up for that?
Perhaps you should weight your skirts like some people do with curtains. You never know...it could work. P.S. I would like to know a little tiny bit more about your day to day job. :)
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ReplyDeleteman, i think it would kick ass if your hubby came home to find that you had put up shelves! I have faith in your 'hammer time' skills! (and not the MC kind ;)
ReplyDeleteAlso, thanks for sharing the 'mooning' stories, glad I am not the only one that embarrasses herself on the regular!
~ab
Wow, those are pretty awesome shelves... I wish I could sit and relax with that many books in my own home!
ReplyDeleteGood luck with getting shelves!
danYELL!! I cannot believe you are flashing our city! haha -- I just get this mental image and crack up! --- Whenever I get a place that Im not renting, I too need some shelves! Ive got a tape measure and some nails.. you get a hammer and we can go to work :)
ReplyDeleteThose bookshelves are incredible. My living room is full of bookshelves (there are four normal sized ones and one huge one), and these pictures have made me realize that if I had built in shelves, my living room would seem way bigger. Too bad I'm a broke renter!
ReplyDeleteI think your butt flash stories are cute, and any male onlooker was lucky to get a glimpse of you! :)
Hahahahaha, and YES, you definitely need shelves like that. :)
ReplyDeleteHahahaha oh lord! The split in particular made me laugh, totally something I would try to play off. I seem to have trouble walking in heels...every so often my ankle will just roll, so I'm walking all confidently in my heels and all of a sudden WHOA and down I go. Clutz! Good luck in your quest to expose your bum to the town, 'tis a noble goal indeed!
ReplyDeleteAlso BUILT IN BOOKSHELVES. I WANT.
WTF is up with me spelling Clutz with a C? I guess I think I own the word enough that I can give it my initial? Hmm.
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